9/3/2020 0 Comments "Finding my Place"I remember my freshman year, though I try to forget, like it was yesterday. I was 18 and all on my own in a state I had never been to before, while my family was at home 2,182 miles away. My freshman year was, by far, one of the worst experiences of my life. I jumped around from friend group to friend group, trying to find my place. Instead, I continuously found people who did not hold the same ideals as me, people who would lie to me, people who would talk about me behind my back, etc. etc. I nearly decided to transfer to another school closer to home in Arizona.
At the end of Spring 2018, over the course of weeks, I built up the courage to speak to a hellbender that was in a class with me. It genuinely took me so long to actually speak to this girl, it’s ridiculous. We were paired together in a group discussion during class and I seized the opportunity to ask her about rugby. Her face lit up immediately and she began to ramble about rugby so quickly that I could barely keep up. Some people might have been even more intimidated by her at this point, but I wasn’t. Katnip was one of the first genuine friends I made on my own at Juniata and she continues to be my friend to this day. Her crazy ramblings roped me in, and I couldn’t stop thinking about rugby. How fun it looked. How crazy it looked. How incredibly intimidated I was by the team. How incredibly excited I was to meet all the players. All these conflicting emotions built and built until I finally caved to my subconscious. I reached out to Rocky, another hellbender, and asked her how I join the team. She immediately added me to the Facebook group the team would use to communicate, and I was greeted by so many team members it was intoxicating. Everyone on the team was so welcoming and positive. I had never experienced such a warm, infectious environment. Shortly after joining the Facebook group, I was invited to a party with some rugby players. Nothing too big, just a small gathering for another player’s birthday. After that night, talking to hellbenders about topics ranging from rugby to politics, I knew I wanted to join rugby. The moment I walked through the door, people were smiling and asking me my name. I was meeting people left and right, but I was no longer intimidated by the strong, beautiful women who play rugby. I was one of them. I became a hellbender because this team was the first place where I felt that I belonged on Juniata campus. This team is not just about a sport, it's about a family. I finally found my place when I decided to try something new, be brave, and become a hellbender. All my love, Onyx
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